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Why Do People change their Relationship after a while?

Contributed by : Saha Nathan
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Relationship is like a beautiful nest created by two people.  First of all, at the beginning of the relationship itself both should be honest and ready to accept the challenges. Nowadays, if you observe, you will find that we do not trust each other...It could be a married life or living relationship or any relationship. We always keep a hidden doubt or distrust for the other person...

Let us see how a human being functions....

Whenever two people live in together , it is not just two is four people...How?

It is like he and his mind along with the emotions and she and her mind along with the emotions. One has to understand this first.

Do you know that who is the biggest politician in this world? It is your mind....

Mind is nothing but a collection of past experiences put together inside you.  And all these experiences are based on your five senses (Touching, Seeing, Smelling, Hearing and Tasting).  Human beings act or react based on these experiences. In other way we can call it as mental patterns....Mental patterns are created by few days to few weeks...few weeks to few months....few months to few years.. Few years to few births...eventually, we can trace back this to origination of your Atma or soul.

Human beings react or act based on these mental patterns.  If you understand this idea, then we understand that a big politician is sitting inside you..

Let us see why people are all goodie goodie  while beginning  a relationship and so nasty at the end of it....

In the beginning of the relationship he/she has projected the opposite gender's expectation. Means he/she acted to satisfy the opposite genders expectations.  Let us call this as HONEYMOON can manage this actions until they have physical relationship. Once it is done for few weeks to months then the true Mental pattern start popping up slowly....there the problem starts ...I do not have to tell the rest of it since you know  it all....This is called HOTSUN period....

In vedic  tradition (Indian tradition), there are seven vows that a couple has to take...the final goal of that vow is to help each other to go through all the challenges and establish the connection to each one's SELF . The start of the  path may be materialistic but the destination is beyond the mind and it is nothing but experiencing the Divinity inside each other.

The moment a person realizes the divinity inside him/her then we do not need to give any more teachings or rules for those kind of matured souls. He/she start respecting other human being  and all living and non-living beings on this planet earth.  This is what I say realizing your SELF. If you realize your SELF then you do not REACT in your life for a situation. Instead you will start to  ACT according to the  situation.

Remember, REACTIONS are based on the EMOTIONS  and ACTIONS are based on the FACTS.

A relationship may start through physical attraction or mental pattern based attraction but one has to understand that problems are inevitable....In a relationship one has to understand that you cannot understand the other person 100%. The best scenario is relating to each other at all times...

How to establish and experience the Divinity within yourself?

Get back into INTEGRATED LIFE.... start understanding your various emotions like fantasies, fears, Worrys, Anger, Attention seeking, comparison, Ego and discontentment.  Work on these emotions by doing introspections..try to attain self actualization !

Handle your body through Yoga or exercise...

Handle your mind by doing meditation....

The Body and mind  sync  up to help you  live an integrated life...if that happens you will see your mind will operate in a calm state.  The bubbling of BLISS happens for no reason.....that is the NEW BEGIING NOW for you to have a possibility to experience the Divinity inside you.

About Author
An experienced writer and counselor in relationship management with 15 years of research and development on human relationships and emotions
  • Author of a renowned book, CRM: A Step-by-Step Approach, which is prescribed for graduate programs in 25 Indian universities
  • Speaks frequently on relationships, and his sessions are broadcast daily on Merina America 24-Hour Tamil Radio (
  • Saha is very passionate about his idols, he practices what he writes.

  • To reach Saha Nathan:
    Please e-mail him at or visit his Web site:



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