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Do we really believe each other?

Contributed by : Saha Nathan

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Few days ago one of my friends asked me that what is happening in this world in terms of friendship. He expressed his concern like this.. I met one female colleague today in a meeting and I just openly asked shall we be friends. He was able to see so many questions and expressions raised in her system like.... why is he telling like that?...what are his intentions ?....Is he a flirting

He requested me to explain it....I responded back to him like this...

Suresh, it is not your problem or her problem...we have lost the innocence of trusting each other and we have landed in a situation where no one can
believe others so easily because of our past experiences, media exposure, the way we have grown up etc...

Our New Beginning Now
Team did a survey recently: All we did it just randomly asked few people just like that to initiate a friendship request. The result was shocking....for a stranger''''s request like this they simply reject it indirectly as well as outright. They were thinking that this is not for
friendship but instead - "for something else" ...

We lost the innocence...means, we lost the way to operate through our hearts...If we operate through our heart then we handle these kind of situations in a
different way...But today we straightaway use our mind''''s logic and start reacting based on our past experience''''s .

I,d like to tell you, one can never experience true friendship or love by operating through Mind. One can use mind as a tool and love as a foundation to operate in
their life.

How to do that?

Instead of reacting to a stranger or a friend just like that ,see the facts and act accordingly. It means, do not give importance to your emotions but see the situation
in terms of facts along with your emotions.

Fact: The information about the person or object or an incident.

Emotions: The feelings which has been attached with the facts.

If you can develop your personality to act, based on the facts or information instead of REACTING through emotions...I can certify that "You
have won your mind"

You might start thinking like ..

The other person''''s maturity is far beyond mine to be open about it..

The other person has genuine intentions behind...

He/she just wants to check my maturity level ....

Again...we can go on doing all sorts of permutations and combinations like this if we use our mind.....It is pure logic...

The only solution is to act to what your heart < your intuition's> say...keeping all the facts intact...but that implies to all...if the person
approaching you have only played a mind move you would be at loss ..Regaining the lost innocence is going to take all of us and not just one
individual ... I would simply like to conclude saying use "Mind as a Vehicle and the heart as Fuel" .

About Author
An experienced writer and counselor in relationship management with 15 years of research and development on human relationships and emotions
  • Author of a renowned book, CRM: A Step-by-Step Approach, which is prescribed for graduate programs in 25 Indian universities
  • Speaks frequently on relationships, and his sessions are broadcast daily on Merina America 24-Hour Tamil Radio (
  • Saha is very passionate about his idols, he practices what he writes.

  • To reach Saha Nathan:
    Please e-mail him at or visit his Web site:



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